My female neighbour only talks to my husband

  • Maria82
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My female neighbour only talks to my husband was created by Maria82

My husband and I got new neighbours over a year ago - a childless couple who are maybe 10 years older than us. Over time I noticed that the woman (who is way more outgoing than her husband) only ever seemed to want to talk to my husband and not me. I just noticed things like when I had a baby she waited until my husband came home to give him a present for us - despite the fact he works v long hours and is only home about 5% of the time in comparison to me , who was at home all the time obviously. She did the same thing when passing on a gift from someone else. You could put this down to just not wanting to bother me, but then there are things like I've heard her talking to him outside. She's never tried to talk to me outside except for one time when it was dark and she mistook me for him - mega weird because he is 6ft 4 and I am 5ft 7 and was heavily pregnant at the time!

I put all of this down to two things -

one my husband does do more work outside than me (I do pretty much ALL of the housework) -

two I am not a 'bubbly' person as such. I struggle to know what to say to people in certain situations and often (like when I'm at home or walking the dog) I just like to be left alone. However I am a very nice person and try to be polite to people.

I was feeling bad about my relationship with my neighbour, thinking I must have done something to make her feel uncomfortable around me, but then I remembered that actually I haven't done anything wrong at all, and every time she's attempted to try and talk to me I have been nice.
Annoyingly our kitchen window overlooks their driveway and often when I go to wash up ( which having a baby I do about 50 times a day) she is getting out of her car and will wave to me so I wave back.

A couple of weeks ago however we pulled up outside the house in our car. We were talking in the car and I saw her watching us from her driveway. When we both got out of the car she shouted to my husband and asked him if he was alright and seemed to completely ignore me. I was v v tired and irritable (I have a baby you know) and as she walked off I couldn't help but say 'I'm alright too' In a voice she may have heard. I feel really awkward now which is horrible because this is my home and I should be able to relax here. At the end of the day I was just reacting to something rude she had done, but I think it was imprudent of me because now I am avoiding my own kitchen window. I have a feeling she possibly fancied my husband a bit which might explain why she only wanted to talk to him.

I've never had this problem with a neighbour before. Advice???
3 years 11 months ago #87517

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Replied by NOPE on topic My female neighbour only talks to my husband

This is an odd one. I would honestly get over this one. Not everyone likes everyone. Maybe she just doesn't like you, sorry but that's what it seems like. (Most of my neighbors don't like me either. I'm not overly friendly and I don't like being too friendly with neighbors....have had some bad experiences with them getting too personal and making pains out of themselves) Do you trust your husband? You're posting on a site where spouses have generally cheated, so I'm just a little confused.

If it really bothers you, I would ask her point blank, "Did we get off on the wrong foot? I just noticed you don't really speak to me but rather go through my husband. I would be more comfortable if you and I could clear the air." I mean, what have you got to lose?
3 years 11 months ago #87524

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Replied by Betrayed Wife on topic My female neighbour only talks to my husband

It sounds like your neighbor is the one with the problem. Just because she seems overly interested in your husband doesn't mean he's going to start sleeping with her. Have you discussed it with him? Don't ask in a confrontational way. Just say something like, "did you ever notice that so-and-so waits until I'm out of the way before she talks to you?" He may have noticed, and maybe he finds it just as annoying as you do. It's possible she's having a midlife crisis. Do you trust your husband? If she hit on him, would he go for it?

As for whether the issue is just that she just doesn't like you, I wouldn't worry about it. Be friendly and neighborly as possible. Lay the groundwork for a friendlier relationship, do a nice gesture or two. But if it doesn't break the ice let it go.

I had a neighbor that seemed a bit friendlier toward my husband (she's 10 years older than us too). But then again he has a way with women and likes attention from women. I never worried that anything would happen between them. She was never unfriendly toward me. As time has gone on she and I have become pretty good neighbors. So maybe time will tell.
It is better to light a candle than to curse the darkness -- ancient proverb.
3 years 11 months ago #87525

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Replied by ALStegall on topic My female neighbour only talks to my husband

Hi,I must have the same neighbor! Its very irritating. A woman knows when someone is wanting the attention of their man. Unfortunately, some women are just that way. They want what you have, they don't necessarily want to put in the work. They just want the fun stuff. They get off on making you feel bad about yourself and questioning your spouse. Men may see the advances or not, men will ignore it or get off on the attention themselves. Its so painfully obvious that this woman is trying to stir up issues with you and your husband. The neighbor on my side is an alcoholic, she is a dried up prune but that don't stop her from wearing short shorts and sticking her wrinkly old ass in my husbands face. Pretty gross. Women like that are dime a dozen! Women like us are hard to come by. I say if my husband wants the dried up prune, go for it. I just make it clear, I don't take returns!
5 months 3 weeks ago #93650

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Replied by ALStegall on topic My female neighbour only talks to my husband

P.s. You can play games yourself with this " chic" haha! Family time in the front yard would be nice, or every time you see her, run out and tell her what a fantastic sex you and your spouse had. Lol! My neighbor actually trying to look in my bathroom window! Weird! She don't work, she's not on disability. She don't make her own money for anything. She has sugar daddies to do that for her. Number 1 gross woman! Obviously our neighbors are just jealous and trying to cause trouble. Good luck!
5 months 3 weeks ago #93651

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