Is he pursuing me

  • Goodgirl84864
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Is he pursuing me was created by Goodgirl84864

Ok so I have an old boss who is abut 6 years older than me.  I haven't worked for him in over 20 years but he is a client of my husbands.  A few years back my husband and I were having some issues - namely his infidelity.  At that time I had decided to divorce him and I knew I had to re-enter the workforce.  So I reached out to my old boss to ask him for a professional reference.  He was more than happy to oblige and suggested we get together for lunch.  I hadn't seen him in over 20 years so I thought it would be nice to meet and catch up.  After all he was doing me a favor and I felt like it was the decent thing to do.  Now keep in mind that when I worked for him he never - EVER - made a pass at me, said an inappropriate comment, not only to me but around me and I worked for him for over 7 years - I was the only female and he was the boss of about 15 salesmen so there were times when someone would make an off handed remark and he was the first one to shut that type of stuff down. so I didn't think a lunch was a big deal - besides he's my husbands client and I was totally transparent to my husband that I was meeting him for lunch.  OK - No problem right?

Ok so long story short, my husband decided to do the work it was going to take to restore our relationship and we reconciled.  We still have some issues but I have to say that he is in it to win it - and I am more than willing to do my part to make it work.

But here's the thing - my old boss will call me every few months just to say hello.  I'm not sure if this is all innocent or if he is trying to pursue me.  He called me this afternoon out of the blue and it all seems so random and he doesn't really have much to say other than to ask me what is going on in my life and how am I.  Every time he calls he invites me to lunch - I have accepted on a total of 3 times but after the last lunch, I thought that maybe I should distance myself - he is privy to my marital status as he asked me point blank at our first lunch and I broke down and told him that I was divorcing my husband - I know I shouldn't have shared that but it was a weak moment and it was all so fresh and raw.  I was completely remorseful not to mention embarrassed that my personal information was out there and I immediately wished I could take it back but whats done is done.

Anyway, I don't know if I'm being paranoid or if he is trying to get involved with me.  I honestly can't tell and I'm sort of torn, because he was a very good boss when I worked for him and he has been a loyal and dedicated client of my husbands and he spends thousands of dollars a year with him - so I don't want to read too much into this and offend him, but at the same time I have no intensions of becoming involved with him in any sort of inappropriate way; and I'm not sure he is interested in me in that way, but for the life of me I can't figure out why he continues to reach out to me.  

I should also say that at our last lunch he for the first time every made an offhanded comment about "well nobody marriage is perfect, just have fun and don't let anyone know" I'm paraphrasing but something to that effect and he also asked me if I could still bear children.  Which given my age 52…. seemed rather inappropriate - I responded by saying my husband has a vasectomy after our 3rd child was born.  But from my perspective I felt like he was trying to find out if I was still menstrating.  Weird.  Is that something a man would want to know?  ????   ????  

Anyway, I'm looking for some advice - especially from the male perspective.  I am told very often that I am very pretty and people are surprised by my age - I have worked very hard to keep my shape and I try to dress like a lady but with a hint of sex appeal because it makes me feel good.

So if there are any fellas out there who might be able to give me some insight as to whats going on in his head or any ladies who can give me some advice as to how to handle this I would much appreciate it.  I just can't put my finger on it but it feels off.  
5 months 2 weeks ago #92884

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