Husband & his lies—big lies.

  • slufferk
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Husband & his lies—big lies. was created by slufferk

I need some advise and support. My husband of nearly a decade is a habitual liar. He lies about having money when we were dating, even to the point we looked for homes to buy in cash because he said he had a trust fund from his grandmother. But he eventually came clean—it was a lie to make me like him. I loved him so much I did forgive him, but the lies never really stopped. Tax time came—our first as a married couple—and low and behold he was lying about his job. Not nearly as much money as he claimed to be making and he even had been unemployed and living off credit cards during our dating period. He claimed to have been working at a hospital as a janitor before he got a new job a few months into dating. He claimed to be a vegetarian like me. If he wasn’t that was fine. But he isn’t vegetarian. He pretends to be, and even thinks I fully believe him,but I have found non-vegetarian food hidden in various place of the house for years. I work two jobs to make ends meet for us. 40 hours primary job and 16 hours secondary job. He works 35 hours at a bank. I am deeply hurt that after some snooping I found he has been hiding money his mom gives him in a separate account. He said his mom says the cash is just a gift for him, not for me, to use as he pleases. He showed me the last text that confirmed this—a 1,000 dollar Christmas gift “just for him”. Am I wrong to feel this is so wrong? We are married. What is his is mine and what mine is his. I work too many hours and put so much work in to this marriage to just be treated like this. I come over after a 16 hour day to a man I deeply love but one that I can’t trust and one that doesn’t seem to have our marriages best interest in mind. 
3 months 1 week ago #93732

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Replied by sal9396 on topic Husband & his lies—big lies.

First, to address one specific thing: If he and his mother had been up front about the money just being for him, that would be one thing. Regardless, I don't understand how you can stay with a person who lies to you about everything. Without trust, how can there be real love? Get out!
3 months 3 days ago #93739

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