Need some advice

  • Buttons30
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Need some advice was created by Buttons30

Hi im looking for some advice or thoughts. I was with my boyfriend for 6months. The first 5 months things were great. I was wary about a new relationship but he was crazy about me and we had a great relationship. We were planning our future together. Hes 40 and im 36.
The last month wasnt the same. I could tell something was different. He finished things saying we didnt have a future. I was pretty upset and after a few days i went to see him and we sorted it all out. He reassured me we had a future and he loved me. A week later he ended it again he was crying in a mess. This time he said his feelings werent as strong his heart wasnt in it anymore. I walked away hurt.
A few days later i got a huge txt saying the whole story was he had met up with an ex a few times for coffee it was purely platonic but he realised he still had feelings for her. 
He said he tried to bury them away and continue with me as i was his future.
He said but the guilt of going behind my back and having feelings kept playing on his mind.  I had said from the start that i dont agree with meeting exs.
I asked him what he wants but he said his head is all over the place. That he loves me but if he really loved me how could he have feelings for an ex. 
I told him i would block him out my life to move on but he said no dont do that as i may need to contact you dowm the line and i dont want to have to chap your door.
I dont understand what he wants . He said i deserve better as hes betrayed me by meeting her when he knew i wouldnt agree to it.
He said hes trying to do the right thing by me.
This is a man who 2 weeks ago said i was more than a gf and that he wanted to marry me one day.
I must add that my mum and sister werent to keen on him. They found him a bit arrogant and patronising.
Im so confused and i cant believe this has happened. He said he cares about me so much but i said well why dont you fight for me then and he said because how will you ever trust me again. I know ive lost an amazing girl. Then at the same breath hes saying he needs time and to be single to sort his head out.
2 months 2 weeks ago #93756

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Replied by sal9396 on topic Need some advice

Block him and move on. He's clearly unstable.
2 months 2 weeks ago #93757

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Replied by Betrayed Wife on topic Need some advice

He even admits his head is all over the place. He doesn't want you to block him because he wants to keep the swinging door open. He wants to keep his options open and keep you strung along. You don't need that. If he can't come to terms with his own feelings he'll only keep you in this spiral. Go ahead and block him. Listen to your mom and sister.
It is better to light a candle than to curse the darkness -- ancient proverb.
2 months 2 weeks ago #93760

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