Cheating 30 years ago

  • mead
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Cheating 30 years ago was created by mead

My wife, then girlfriend, went out on a date with another guy when she went home for summer break. We were committed to each other and deeply in love. We couldn’t wait for summer to be over so we could be together.
She decided to tell me last weekend after 30 years as if it were no big deal. Well, it is a huge deal to me!!!
One, she cheated on me!
Two, she lied for 30 years!
She said “nothing happened!” Maybe...Maybe not!

we have had a great marriage and we are life partners with 2 wonderful grown children. We love each other and nothing will change.
But...I am so hurt!!!
what should I do?
1 year 6 months ago #93616

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Replied by sal9396 on topic Cheating 30 years ago

I see this is the second time you have posted about this, and the second time I am replying with the same advice.

You should take a deep breath, and relax first of all. Did she sleep with this guy on that one date 30 years ago before you were in a fully committed relationship? If not, it's a bit of a stretch to say she cheated on you. It's OK to be hurt,m and it's OK to tell her you are hurt, but you have to put it in context. My wife cheated on me, multiple times in multiple ways, so I know how you feel and what your wife did isn't that bad. Frankly, I don't think it's that big a deal at all, but that's just me. Again, tell her how you feel and if she acknowledges your feelings and  apologizes, you should just move on.

So, pretty much what I said in the previous thread. Are you not hearing what you want to hear? If this is something that is troubling you this deeply, you might need to seek some professional help in putting this in context.
1 year 6 months ago #93617

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