How do I let go?

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I’ll try to make this as brief and as easy on myself as possible to not open a lot of wounds I’ve been covering up.
my husband and I have been married for 6.5 years, together for 10.
On the surface our marriage looks good, and usually is. We have a nice comfy life and really enjoy our time together.

The first stint of cheating that I am aware of was two years into our marriage. He ended up at a happy ending massage parlour and not only received a happy ending massage, went to her house and slept there for two nights while I was away for work. After finding out shortly after by seeing a message on his phone, we began to work on things. He was committed to fixing what we needed to and this took a lot for me to regain any trust.

fast forward, and without me being aware, he continued to visit massage parlours. When confronted, he blamed it on me.

Third instance is when he got tinder, and decided to start a little relationship with an older woman (10 years older). I found out and he ended it on the spot. 

at this time, we had already been half relocated to our new city... 15 hours from the City we lived in for so long. I decided to take the leap and start my new job in the city and go from there.

things had been seeming to be going fine. He committed to therapy and counselling.... but.
once again, on his phone I came across him looking at escorts, massage parlours, tinder, etc. 

on the surface he is a great man. He works hard for us, supports me and my desires and generally is a loving man.

i think he has deep rooted issues from his childhood (he was sexually abused by a man in his family), his sister also was. I believe he uses sex as a tool to forget about real life issues. I actually think he is addicted to it.

i don’t know how to let go because I truly love him so deeply. I am scared to live without him. 

please help:( 
7 months 1 week ago #93784

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